While the line comes from the Peanuts Halloween special, you can use Charlie Brown's exact intonation after looking in his bag as you read the next line:
I got a Dilbert calendar.
But I've trained my family, back in Boston, away from anything that isn't plane-, airport-, or TSA-friendly in the last few years, so it was in some ways a decent attempt.
But I brought for my sister's boyfriend, my cousin, and my best friends gift boxes from the Spice House -- her boyfriend got the more generic Meat package (he's not much into the hot spices), while the others got the BBQ collection. These went over well, I do admit.
And friends here who helped with the cat-sitting and whatnot are receiving packages from Harvard Square's Burdicks (the word "decadent" is too easily thrown around with chocolate these days, but Burdicks makes its own very, very rich hot chocolate mix) and Tealuxe (40 grams of their oolong).
As for me, I need a saucier and a 12" saute pan, and I've been eyeing a couple of the cookbooks that focus on sauces, so I anticipate some self-gifting soon...